Do Not Stretch Like Me

A few people have asked me about my stretching routine since I posted about stretching. So I will cover that in this post, but first...

Stretch as I say, not as I stretch

First, I don't have formal education in athletics or coaching sports or as a personal fitness trainer or anything like that. You would be wise to listen to anyone who is a more qualified expert than me. As with any exercise program you should check with your doctor before you start doing it.

Second, and I can't emphasize this enough, the stretching I do is:

1. NOT the stretching I did to become as flexible as I am.
2. NOT safe or smart for anyone do to do... I have pulled hip flexor muscles doing this numerous times.

Third, my general recommendation for building flexibility - and what I should be doing and mostly am not doing - is using dynamic high kick stretches like Ax Kick stretch or Cheer Leader Front Kick stretches for warm ups, and using front splits and straddle/side splits as cool down stretches:

1. Dynamic kicking stretches engage your cardio and thus fit in well as part of a warm up routine. Splits don't get you high kicks so much as the dynamic kicking stretches do. I recently had to start doing dynamic kicking stretches again because my left leg couldn't kick above groin level even though I was bringing my head to my left knee in the front splits on a regular basis! Not only are these dynamic kick stretches easier to do than the splits, for martial artists they are much more important.
2. Static stretching like the splits over time help you maintain mobility and build over all flexibility, BUT they can REDUCE your muscular output for hours after doing them! So they are VERY good for you to do, but NOT immediately before you work out! Static stretches like Yoga at the end of a work out can do a lot to reduce muscle soreness, and that is where the splits belong in your workout, at the end!

My Hypocrisy

Now the gory details of my actual stretching routine (see also 2nd video in my last blog post.) I usually do this cold (you should always warm up first) after standing mediation or sitting in a chair for hours working on a computer:

1. I start in the side/straddle splits, feet flat on the floor with my hands on the foor, with my my arms straight and my hips at my shoulder level or higher, like the beginning of a diver bomber.
2. At this point the biggest challenge is to try to keep my lower back straight with by rear sticking out a little, this sets up the angle in my hips to do the splits right.
3. Breathing is obviously important.
4. What I have to do here is focus on relaxing the muscles being stretched. If I had to describe this, it's like using breath to hollow out the inner thigh and groin muscles, and as they feel empty they relax and stretch further.
5. From here my rear is going down and backwards.
6.  In this phase I may do some tricks to get unstuck if my muscles start to freeze up, which I will get into later below*... about 90% of the time I don't need to.
7. The next step is that I can feel my calf muscles touching the floor even though I am not in a full side split yet.
8. At this point my posture changes significantly. First my toes now point more up towards the sky (than in front of me when I first started the split.) Second I try to get my shoulders and head up above my hips as much as I can, getting more body weight on the muscles I am stretching.
9. At this point I might do unstuck tricks*.
10. Once I can feel my groin is flat on the ground, I know my side/straddle split isn't quite done, because I am still in too much of a v-shape, so now I work on getting my hips forward, until I am in a full side split.
11. Now I rotate my upper body and hips to go into a front split on which ever side of my body feels stiffest that day while doing the side/straddle splits. Usually this involves my hips coming more off the ground, so that when I get to my front split there's some more stretching that happens as I get my groin back in touch with the floor. At this point my upper body is held up by my arms.
12. Once I am in the full front split, I use my arms to make my back 90 degrees to the floor as much as possible, and then take my arms off the floor and try to lean backwards a little.
13. Then I lean forward and grab my forward foot with both hands and slowly pull my head to my knee or shin.
14. Then I lean back into the front split.
15. Now I use my arms to pick my group up off of the ground a few inches, and then repeat steps 12-14 again on that same side.
16. On the third repetition I have one hand grab the other wrist behind my back, and pull by wrists towards the ceiling and I lower my head towards my knee or shin.
17. I then use my arms to elevate my groin off the ground and rotate back into the middle/straddle splits, and repeat steps 7-10 above so that I am in a full straddle/middle split again.
18. Now I repeat steps 11-17 for the other side that I haven't stretched yet. 
19. So far you will see I have done the side/straddle splits three times, and the front splits 6 times (3 times on each side.)
20. From the third side split I lean back into a sitting position and end with a butterfly/tailor seat stretch, which I do 2 or three repetitions of (this is because I was losing mobility to cut my toe nails even though I was doing my spits regularly, and this cured that problem.)

*There are three tricks I use to get unstuck. If I have been stretching every single day like I should, then I rarely have to use these, but sometimes my slug-like commitment to fitness means the only conditioning I did that day was standing mediation, shame on me. Here's the tricks to get unstuck:

• Transition to front splits early on whatever side of my body is giving me the most resistance in the side/straddle spilt. This is ONLY step 11 and 17 above (NOT 12-16,) and it does not replace any of the front splits further in the routine.
• Quit and start over. It's too painful, I am too lazy, so I just give up, relax for 60 seconds and try again. I am always surprised by what a Ninja I am on the second try.
• This is the dark magick secret you are looking for with the splits: While in the split, you flex all of your muscles being stretched as hard as you possibly can without changing what position your body is in. As you are finishing your flex, breath out relaxing your muscles you were just flexing. By flexing, we get an opportunity to INTENTIONALLY RELAX afterwords. The flex should happen for at least several seconds. This can be repeated a few times. This method has a high risk of injury, so it is only for people who have been stretching daily for a while to make bigger flexibility gains, and has to be done VERY cautiously... even then it is risky.

That's my routine, and I have warned and forewarn you not to do it (any ax kick stretching I do is when I am practicing martial arts.) I have been crystal clear on what you should do instead of this routine. If you don't listen to my warning, I suggest you have them play this song for you to think of me on your way to the hospital as you pray that you might be able to do martial arts again one day: