At Antioch University Seattle in 2005 & 2006 I and other graduate assistants came up with a hypothesis about human relationships which we called "Proximity Theory." Proximity means how physically close an object is to another object. We theorized that how physically close two people were to each other was the most important factor in weather or not those two people would develop a relationship of any kind, in any given amount of time.
When pushing agendas for upcoming meetings, we realized we needed to have "meetings before the meeting," which were smaller group discussions before the time official official meeting. Objections to any given proposal at a meeting needed to be determined and if possible settled before any official meeting actually began. The easiest way for the meetings-before-the-meeting to happen was for people to be working near by each other.
But we soon realized this applied to other relationships as well. When it was all said and done, if you have two attractive and likable heterosexual 17-year-olds who are members of the opposite sex in a room together for a long enough period of time, you will have a teen pregnancy on your hands. That relationship will not form in that time with anyone outside of that room. Proximity.
This needs to be taken into much more careful consideration with today's dating services, singles communities and dating apps. Long-distance is undesirable. It's wasting time, and we only have so much time to give.
My hero Michelle Stone recently took down her YouTube channel 132 Problems. The channel was a solid argument against God having anywhere actually commanded polygamy and against Joseph Smith ever having done polygamy. Many have suggested she took down her channel because of pressure from local Church leadership, but it's also worth noting she recently returned to University studies, presumably in history.
HOWEVER, in one of her last episodes she interviews Mads Larsen, a famous anthropologist from Northern Europe. What he has identified is 1/3 of the men reproduce in that area, relative to most of the women reproducing, meaning that by way of divorce, the men who are reproducing are reproducing with multiple women. THIS implies that polygamy in the early LDS church was more so driven by women than by men. We know that the earliest polygamy practiced by LDS leadership was by the Apostles on their mission to the UK, where they were converting Christian women who were already trying to practice polygamy.
I have gotten to know more than a few single ladies over the last year. I often hear shockingly unrealistic expectations from women in their late 30's and 40's essentially expecting to find sugar daddies. The obvious logical problem here is that sugar daddies date women in their 20's. I personally value maturity and character in a relationship, but that's not the resource men are looking for when they buy their way into a relationship. Unfortunately disconnection with reality in general, and specifically expecting a sugar daddy to come sweep you off your feet as a fully grown and adult woman, is not a sign of maturity or character.
YouTube suggests over half of women will only date about one in a thousand men (6 feet tall, less than 10% body fat, making $200,000 per year, single, educated, heterosexual, monogamous.) Now they ARE dating, which tells me something very important: they are believing lies told to them by opportunistic men who are misrepresenting their income and other aspects of their life. So these women are finding a one-in-twenty man who has the physical traits they are looking for, but who is also willing to lie about all sorts of things in order to get laid.
Women, please understand the reason why the guy you slept with moved on right away is he knew that your interest in him was based on the illusion he provided: there never was any possibility of a long term relationship because you never wanted who he really was.
Having unrealistic expectations is how you become a side piece. If your sights are too high, you will only be aiming for men who are dishonest or who already have enough mates, and you will be just one more extra. Promiscuity is it's own punishment with it's own built in karma. It makes you vulnerable to opportunistic men. It makes you mostly sad and alone. You think the most eligible guy you have slept with in your 20's is the same type of guy you can expect to marry in your 40's, the problem being is that guy was fake in the first place.
My first martial art style was Tae Sho Arnis. I understand that an Arnis stick is a sparring place holder for a machete. I also understand the value of an Arnis stick for disarming someone with a knife. What has caught my attention more recently is a more common stick variation: the billy club.
I saw my first billy club in the late 90's in Pittsburgh, and was immediately impressed by the practicality of this weapon:
It is much shorter than an Arnis stick making it easier to conceal, deploy, swing and thrust at close range. It's round edges make for a finer striking surface than a human fist, and it's hardwood construction makes it far less likely to break. The Billy Club's shorter length can afford more mass and still be swung at the same speed as an Arnis stick or knife. From a self defense perspective this weapon is much more like an improvised weapon you are likely to find to defend yourself with such as a heavy flashlight or a butcher knife than a longer Arnis stick, and it is also more similar to the length of weapon you would be likely to be attacked by.
This weapon has been brought to my attention by people practicing Korean martial arts. Apparently almost all Korean martial arts have some kind of "Dan Bong" techniques:
I would like to see this weapon explored more in free sparring.
